Perhaps Something in a Used Pyramid

Saturdays on the WTIT Tape Radio Blog, we do a meme that is called Saturday 8. A woman named “Lola” posts the questions. All quotes in bold are from Lola. Also, any spelling and grammar mistakes that are in Lola’s meme, we leave there. We wouldn’t want to mess around with her “art”.

Alas, we are Lola’s least favorite participant. We are a little "rough" on her at times. We can't really understand why she hates our participation. Other than the fact we have noticed that Lola hates almost everything. It is very possible that Lola just does not really understand the concept of "humor”. We wrote her once to help explain. She obviously was still not amused.
sat8 :: morbidity?

a close family friend passed this week, so we're going to take a look at the (lighter) side of death, just like he wanted it!

1. my friend's dad refused to let him create a formal funeral for him. some people need to grieve with a such a ceremony. do you need a formal "goodbye" to properly grieve? Now Lola, it has not occurred to you that to each of us, perhaps each loss might have a different answer? I tend to need a tux to formally grieve.
2. we're getting together with a huge BBQ and lots of alcohol, which was his request, in a few weeks to memorialise him. would you prefer this to a formal ceremony? I really do not think there is anything better than “lots of alcohol”. It’s hard to improve on that. Lola, props to "him" and your family to honor such a noble attitude!

3. i plan on having a mausoleum to be buried in, full of fat little marble cherubs and a nice place for my kids to come and sit & talk to me after i go. what's your final resting place going to look like? God am I glad I am not one of your kids. You want a tomb, perhaps something in a used pyramid. Trust me, the kids won’t be coming around to "chat" to a fucking wall.

4. my friend is out of touch with everyone, which is understandable. however, he's not even ringing up his live-in girlfriend to keep her apprised of his plans. his mother, on the other hand, is on the phone nonstop talking to everyone. when you grieve, do you shut yourself away from friends/family, or do you need them there with you to help ease the pain? Friends, this is a perfect "Lola Question" It goes on forever and makes no sense at all. It is mostly because of her entire lack a grammar. Your friend is now out of touch? Death has a way of doing that. How can they be "live in" and they need to ring up (sic)? And somebody tell his mother to stay off the fucking phone.

5. the first pet i lost was a marmalade tom named herman. herman got eaten by an alligator (no, i'm serious). i remember being 5 yrs. old and my parents telling me that herman was seen getting gobbled up by an alligator. who was the first pet you lost as a child? I had a pet alligator that choked to death on a big fat house cat.

6. when i was about 9 years old, my friend and her brothers were killed in a drunk-driving accident. it was the first funeral i'd ever gone to. do you remember your first funeral?Technically my first funeral will be my last. Has anyone ever taught you english so that your questions could make some sort of , well, sense? Answer: No idea who was the first stiff I saw.
7. for centuries, people have been buried in mass graves due to disease, convenience, or war crimes, etc. do you feel mass graves are ok because we're simply a mass of cells which can be broken down, or do you feel that every single person who dies deserves a solitary resting place with a marker, etc.? Are you shitting me? Give me a mass grave. It must be very lonely in a solo coffin. And do the math on every person having a grave. We would have no more land by say, 2018. Or we good rule that anyone buried over 100 years now can be tossed.
8. OT question - i have a work semi-formal ceremony to go to tonight. are you the type that likes to go to company-sponsored lavish events where everyone dresses up to hit the open bar with free gourmet food, OR would you prefer something that's quiet and more reserved, like a "thank-you" lunch? I don’t even want to meet a person who’d answer this question with “a thank-you lunch”. This question has nothing to do with anything. Lola, you have totally lost it. That is, if you ever had it all. An open bar with free gourmet food is like sitting on the right hand of God.

That is about as much damage that the WTIT Tape Radio Blog can do to your Saturday. Parts of today's Saturday 8 were originally published on November 18, 2006. Tomorrow means we will proudly present Sunday Stealing and we will complete the second half of 50 odd questions that we stole last week. (I mean seriously, a 103 Question meme? And tagging? I think not. {deep breath}) Enjoy your evening! If you deem it worthy join us tomorrow for Stealin'. But most importantly, enjoy your weekend. We will be here.
Same time. Same blog. Goodnight, Lola.

8 comments:

Epiphany Alone said...

This one is my favorite Saturday 8. I spent 6 of the questions wondering whose funeral it was - the friend or the friend's father:

"my friend's dad refused to let him create a formal funeral for him"...

Actually, the best the guest of honor can do is request. The dead guy doesn't really have a leg to stand on to refuse to let...

Bud Weiser, WTIT said...

Heath-

You are exactly correct. She uses prponouns indicating different people in the same sentence. You'd be right about the dead guy to (BWAHAHA)

Mimi Lenox said...

This is classic Lola and as convoluted as it gets. The more confused she seems the better your answers are. Here's to confusion!

Bud Weiser, WTIT said...

Mims-
You are SO right. It might be her best ever...

Anonymous said...

Sorry you lost your alligator, Bud. Did you at least get a couple pairs of shoes out of him?

Bud Weiser, WTIT said...

Hey Gale-
Yes, he made great shoes! HAHA!

Anonymous said...

What in the heck is a "thank-you lunch?" Where do I sign-up for one?!

VERY, very funny stuff Bud!

Anonymous said...

I think a "Write A Question, Lola-Style" contest is in order! Pleeease?